What a Time To Be Alone by Chidera Eggerue
Summary
This isn’t your typical book where each page is filled front to back. It’s a collection of quotes, paragraphs, cool colours and designs that take you on a journey of self-confidence during the loss of a relationship. Think of it as a pick me up, and one that is SO much better than eating your feelings out or crying to no avail (among other quite exhausting ways of coping). Except after reading this book, you will feel a sense of empowerment that you know only comes from within yourself. I am forever grateful and thankful for Chidera for her inspiration and for helping me feel better in my own skin. I am by nature very sensitive and over process emotions - so it was nice to hear from a fellow sensitive warrior and felt like I had a chat with a super empowering girlfriend. To those who felt like they grew up alone and had to navigate a lot on their own, take Chidera out for a walk and she will dispense her and her mother’s wisdom that will help you heal and get through. Most importantly, it will help you understand that you are already enough.
Lessons From the Book
Healing is a process. Trust the process and allow yourself to hurt
Save some love for yourself - you deserve it
Your kindness can devastate you so: mind your own business is the new black
Focus on yourself and your own self-development. Stop trying to focus so much on those that add nothing to your life
Silence can never be misquoted
Sometimes it’s better to just not know. It’s okay to not know
It’s okay to be vulnerable and care and feel the feels. Stop ignoring it but don’t let them drown you in the victim mentality
Learn to take any loss like a boss
Self love is the least aggressive, most effective form of intimidation
If someone has more pride than vulnerability to show you, they are not in a position to love you healthily
Sometimes, ‘I Forgot’, actually mans ‘I didn’t care enough to pay attion ‘
Apologies do not change intentions
Don’t be scared to raise your standards
You cannot save anyone
Don’t forget to congratulate your friends, no matter how well they are doing
Sometimes, knowing that someone is rooting for you in enough
Give people their flowers while they can still smell them
What’s mine won’t miss me
You’ll mean the world to someone someday (and it won’t just be your mum)
Empty promises are often a distraction
Explaining why you hurt is not always worth it
Accepted apologies are not contracts
Regret is worse than rejection
May you find security in your solitude
I would recommend this book to
Anyone with sensory processing sensitivity (SPS) trait, also known as HSP trait
If you know someone who has been through a breakup - buy this book for them